Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Scary/Exciting/Big things

I've been doing a great deal of pondering lately. This should come as no surprise, of course. Every six months or so I go on a Quest of Pondering, Angst, and Re-Evaluation. (I'm telling you, if there was a contest for introspection I. WOULD. WIN.)

If I could have, I would have spent many an hour walking on picturesque lookouts, thinking deeply, my hair blowing in the wind. Like that scene on Pride and Prejudice, when Elizabeth is staring out over the cliff edge. Pondering.

Yeah . . .

I probably looked more like this, though.

At any rate, as I said, I've been through this before. What can I say, I'm a little slow. This time, however, I've come to some fairly scary and big thoughts. Thoughts about who I am as a writer. What I want. What I am and am not willing to do.

Probably the biggest thought is about what I will write. It's also the scariest. In a nutshell, I think I've found my voice.

And I think it will be a tough sell.

But I'm going to write the book anyway.

The thing is, I've had this feeling in my gut for a long time. I avoided it, because, to be totally honest, I want to be published. I really, really want to be published. So, I've pushed this inkling away to pursue ideas that seemed more marketable. (Don't get me wrong, I loved these ideas, but I can be honest as to why I picked them over others.)

But it's time to take a risk, folks. For me, anyway. So I plan to. There are going to be some changes around here. Because like I said, my pondering involved all aspects of my writing career, not just what idea to pick. So be ready, gentle blog readers. Be ready. More details coming soon.


Jill Wheeler said...

Write the story you were meant to write! Go for it, woman!

Tere Kirkland said...

Can't wait to hear more about it! The best work comes from the heart, so I'm sure it'll be awesome.

Dominique said...

Write the story that feels right. Markets change. Great stories are great stories. Can't wait to hear more.

Shannon O'Donnell said...

Good for you for being willing to take the risk!! Ellen Hopkins is proof that risks CAN pay off. :-)

Michelle Davidson Argyle said...

Oh, please share soon!!!

Lisa Marie Miles said...

Good for you for taking a risk! I've taken a little break from writing lately for the same thing.

Jade said...

Ooh! I love a good ponder. I believe risks are always good for your writing. Good luck!!

Bethany Mason said...

Looking forward to reading about your inner reflections and it gives me hope that one day I'll be able to say I've found my voice as well.

storyqueen said...

In the end, you have to write what your heart tells you to.

I can't wait to hear where you will be going.

Abby Minard said...

I think its a great move! Always write what you are passionate about. It will definitely show in your work.

Natalie Whipple said...

I love when you ponder:)

Colene said...

Wow, can't wait to read more and find out what your voice is like!

Everyone else is right, you just have to write what you feel and worry about the rest later.

Work hard enough and you'll make it(or so I'm told)

Glad to have found you!

Miriam S. Forster said...

Why CAN'T there be an award for introspection? *gives Renee award*

Can't wait to see what happens next!

Jessie Oliveros said...

I want a pondering cliff. I just have a pondering chair. So when are you going to tell us more? You used the word "risk" and called us "gentle readers" so I'm going to guess...slasher romance.

Renee Collins said...

Jill-Well, it's more the type of story I was meant I write. I think . . . heh, anyway, thanks! :)

Tere-I hope so!

Dominique-ha, I don't know about "great," but it's definitely the story that feels right. :)

Shannon-Thanks. I think I'm just ready to bite the bullet. :)

Michelle-I will, though now I feel like there's all this build up, that when I finally tell you you'll be like, "Oh . . ." :)

Lisa-Definitely. I thrive off of regular breaks. I'd go crazy without them.

Jade-Pondering is awesome, isn't it?

Renee Collins said...

Bethany-It definitely hasn't been an easy road. And I'm still not sure I have my voice down completely. But I know I'm on the right road.

Shelly-Very true. As scary as that can be sometimes.

Abby-I hope it does!

Natalie-hehe, and you know just how much I actually do it. Glad you don't think I'm crazy. (Well . . . maybe you do . . .) ;)

Colene-Thanks! It is kind of exciting to see where I should go, but I know I still have lots of work to do to hone that voice just right.

Miriam-*accepts award, wipes tear* Thank you, thank you. I dreamed of this day!

Jessie-lol, you found me out! Be ready for blood and bodices. It's gonna ROCK.

lora96 said...


And I totally ponder while mopping. Makes me feel my education wasn't wasted.

Terri Tiffany said...

Good for you!! Risk is good:)

Kasie West said...

I wish I could ponder while I vacuumed. Maybe if I actually vacuumed I would discover that I could. Unfortunately, I don't have to be doing anything remotely useful to ponder. :) I'm glad you've found your voice and I can't wait to see the results. (because your not-voice is pretty amazing, so bring on the voice).

Chantele Sedgwick said...

Good luck! Different and risky is good! Can't wait to hear what you're writing! (I'm sort of a lurker, so hi! :)